I remember being in middle school… all the other girls around me were taller than me and they were not as skinny as me. You might be thinking, “hey skinny is a good thing” but not for me. I weighed eighty-four pounds when I was thirteen, I hated it. I was so skinny; I thought I looked like a stick. The worse, I didn’t have any boobs! By now all my friends and girls around me had boobs. There was a point when I started eating a lot to try to gain weight, it worked, but it went mainly to my stomach. So now, I had a new problem – I was short, a little chubby, had no boobs, and had skinny legs (or as I called them chicken legs). Ughhh, could this be any worse??
I then moved to Mexico for about a year and a half, I still thought I was skinny and short, but for some reason it didn’t really bother me as much when I was there. Perhaps it was the fact that in Mexico I was around girls that looked more like me lol. It was then that I started realizing that we all come in different shapes and sizes and started accepting myself the way I was. Being the shortest one of six siblings in my family, I didn’t understand why I was so short, when two of my brothers were close to 5’ 10’’. When both of my sisters were taller than me, when my parents were taller than me! But I slowly started to let it go. To accept the fact that everyone is different and that instead of questioning why I should embrace it and love my body as it is.
I moved back to the states my sophomore year and I’m not going to lie, I struggled with my weight and height the rest of high school. I mean I felt “ok” about myself, but it refrained me from doing things I wanted to do like being a cheerleader. I never tried out because I thought I was too short and too skinny and because of that I did not feel pretty enough to be on the team. It wasn’t until my junior year, that I discovered that I was a petite girl. It finally dawned on me that I was not going to get any taller, nor get a bigger body frame, nor grow bigger boobs.
I’m a little shy of 5’1’’ (the last time I checked which was years ago, don’t think I grew any taller since then), have a short torso, short legs, short arms, in essence I am petite! Through exercise I have managed to maintain my weight at a level were I don’t look three months pregnant. (Yes, people have asked me before if I am pregnant, when at my heaviest!) It’s been a roller coaster of emotions and struggles and asking myself why I am not at least 5’3’’ like my sisters or wear a D cup like my sister, but over the years I have learned to love my body. I am PETITE!! I embrace the fact that I can make myself look taller with heels, thank God for heels!! I have learned how through fashion I can make myself look just about any way that I want and feel beautiful, which is one of the reasons why I love fashion so much!!
I’m not going to lie, yes, I am human and from time to time I fail myself and start thinking why this and why not that, but I don’t let it bother me and instead I research new fashion trends, that I know will make me look beautiful and that will embrace my body.
I hope that this blog is helpful to many other women struggling with learning how to love their bodies, just like me. Bisous! XOXO!
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